The Auld Git’s Blog

Just another Auld Git

Posts Tagged ‘publicity

Amy Winehouse’s Cat

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We’ve had Saddam’s cat a while back, now we have exclusive paparazzi shots of Amy Winehouse’s cat.

Since the picture was taken, the cat has taken advantage of the latest Winehouse gimmick to gain sympathy for her filthy addictions, by having her publicity machine manufacture stories about her being ill, rather than dried out. While she’s out of sight, the cat has been able to have its addictions treated by its personal vet, and is now completely clean, and determined to stay that way now that its escaped.

The rumour machine claims the cat has arranged for a revenge hit on its former owner, and is being paid millions, as people flock to contribute to its scheme to rid the world of the horribleness.

cat
more cat pictures

Written by auldgit

June 23, 2008 at 11:33 am

Posted in Celebrity vermin

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Katona publicity machine gears up

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There are few sights tie with seeing the mass of human skin that is Kerry Katona lugging her huge body around the small screen. She’s grown to be all but unrecognisable from pics taken only four years ago in 2001 (thanks for that MTV – we didn’t really have to see those pics, and I now have to get my carpet cleaned).

With the Max Clifford “Gimme Money” machine cranking itself into action to create and kill rumours to keep the Katone profile (and ‘money-for-nothing’ rolling in) in view, we’re supposed to believe that DRUGGY KATONA (and SMOKING PREGNANT KATONA) is going into well-known drug rehab bolt-hole of the rich and (supposed to be) famous, The Priory.

Telling us what’s really happening, MTV announced that current filming of Crazy in Live (thank god this rubbish is on subscription only, so all we have to suffer of it is the trailers – they’re sickening enough) while the good Mr Clifford assures the watching world (hah! that her career (what career? she says herself she’s only famous for being famous), and her marriage (to a cab driver that picked her last year – that’s appropriate – was she out for an evening of being ‘picked up’?) is fine and her new hubby is not cheating on her already (just give him time), and of course, she is not being treated for drug related problems, and even has paper to prove she hasn’t taken any drugs, well, not recently, and not the illegal ones that were tested for.

No, we’re assure by her publicity mogul that Ms Katona is suffering nothing more than bi-polar disorder, possibly better known as manic depression, and the cause of dramatic mood swings.

And this waste of skin is one of MTV’s most popular celebrities?

Of course she is, because she’s going to bring them loadsamoney by letting them film the birth of her next baby in May.

Can you believe the state allows a smoking, drug-crazed, money grabbing manic depressive to have a fourth child?

Isn’t modern society wonderful, in the way it tolerates and helps people live a normal life?

Provided they have money and a good agent that is – can you imagine some wee lone teen girl living in poverty, and with the same health problems and addiction the Katona thing claims to have, beig left allowed alone? I doubt it, and there would soon be an army of social workers arriving to take her kids away, re-home them, and probably remove the baby from her at birth, and she’d never see it again.

Written by auldgit

March 20, 2008 at 11:36 am