The Auld Git’s Blog

Just another Auld Git

Archive for the ‘Film’ Category

Justice – celebrity style for trampy Lohan

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Don’t you just love the special treatment handed out to celebrities – and anyone unfortunate enough to fall somewhere under their shadow?

Lifelong tramp, druggy, and alcohol draining point, Lindsey Lohan, gets thrown into the Betty Ford clinic – really a holiday resort for the rich and famous – and then starts to assault the staff.

Who pays?

Not Teflon Lohan – no way!

Rather, a staff member the sodden so-called ‘star’ lashed out against gets the order of the boot, on a convenient charge of breaking patient confidentiality.

What a crock and set-up.

If that was a sacking offence, then the whole management of the Betty Ford clinic should be out on the street, begging bowls in hand.

If they were honouring that particular rule, then we should never know who is at the clinic, but the managers and owners don’t seem to have any problem with making sure the newspapers, magazines, and other media have a full and up to date listing of who is going in and out of the place, and usually why as well.

But that’s good publicity isn’t it, and good for business – not betraying their own patient’s confidentiality.

For some strange reason I cannot quite fathom, the word ‘hypocrite’ has just come to me. I wonder why?

[url=]BBC News – Lindsay Lohan suspected in attack on rehab staff member[/url]


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December 22, 2010 at 1:30 pm

Amy Winehouse appears in Disaster Movie

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According to the word on the web – and I can well believe it after having seen the trailer on TV – the horror that is Amy Winehouse actually played the part of herself in Disaster Movie.

On one of her famous “disappearances” – officially attributed to being in rehab/hospital/prison/asylum, she was actually taking some time out to get into the part, and while her minders usually see to such such things as washing her, keeping the alien attached to her head in some sort of order, filing down her fangs, and scraping some of the makeup she pastes on to her face, all these things were left to develop and mature for a few weeks until she was really “ripe” and looked like her natural self.

It’s said that the smell and language was so bad (not rude, just the unintelligible dribbling she used by then), everyone that had to appear on set with her, including the crew, demanded Danger Money to make up for the number of times they threw up if they got too close, and to pay for the shots they demanded, in case they caught something from her.

Even the alien was complaining at the end, and called in its ambassador to insist on having her hosed down the moment filming was over, otherwise it was going to off and eat some children instead.

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September 4, 2008 at 3:19 pm

Another kid suffers a daft celebrity name

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Nicole Kidman’s father has revealed he suggested naming his granddaughter Sunday, having been inspired by artist Sidney Nolan’s muse Sunday Reed.

Kidman and husband country singer Keith Urban welcomed Sunday Rose Kidman Urban into the world on Monday in the US.

According to the news, Sunday is Kidman’s first biological child – what were the other? Vegetables?

I suppose the poor little creature is lucky that all she was lumbered with was “Sunday”, at least it’s not on the same scale of things that could be dragged up from the past like Zowie, or some of the other monstrosities that could only be given to celebrity vermin offspring, because if they had to go for a job interview (like normal people) then the potential emoloyer would take one look at the name on the application, consider they were being made a fool of, and discard the application without further consideration – the amusingly named offspring would either die of starvation because they could earn their keep, or have to go somewhere like the European Court of Human Rights, and have their parent found guilty of some form of cruelty, and be forced to pay for their keep for the rest of their life.

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July 9, 2008 at 10:42 am

Snipes wins three new ‘awards’

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Well, it looks as if Wesley Snipes didn’t fiddle enough from his taxes to grease the appropriate palms, or maybe he just doesn’t know the right funny handshake.

One year in the slammer for each failure to file a tax return, and no hint (at the moment) that the three year sentence will magically transform itself into some sort of probation, or maybe day-release, or a nice little tag.

Our man should be taking a leaf out of the Paris Hilton book of blowj how to do hand hard time. A few more stints of bursting into tears maybe, and perhaps looking as if he’s coming apart at the seams while he’s got his back planted firmly, cheeks tighly clenched while ‘Alice’ sidles alongside, and he should be able to win over another judge on appeal, and get a reduction.

Wouldn’t be surprised to learn that there’s a roomful of lawyers somewhere, busily working out how to sue the judge and the court for the millions that Snipes will claim he will lose while he’s being banged up inside.

Maybe he’ll meet some vamps.

Written by auldgit

April 25, 2008 at 2:24 am

Gimme Gimme Gimme

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Worth more than most of will ever earn in our entire lives, supposed ‘star’ Wesley Snipes just wants more money, anybody’s money, yours, mine, the government’s, the taxman’s – he doesn’t really care as long as he can have it.

Able to afford clever lawyers, Snipes manages to avoid being found guilty of out and out fraud and deception, which would really get him into trouble, but prosecutors have still recommended that he faced the maximum penalty for a “brazen defiance” of US tax laws.

Wesley Snipes should spend three years in prison and be fined $5m (£2.5m) over tax evasion charges, US prosecutors have said.

Like it will ever actually happen, that one of the shiny (is that the sheen of Teflon I see?) people should go to jail for something so trivial.

Unless he gets judged by someone with a sense of reality, and that wants to send a warning shot across the bows of the rest of the holy celebrity clan, then I suspect there will be the rustling sound of a cheque book coming out, the swooshing sound of pen signing on the line, and the good Mr Snipes will jet off to enjoy his millions, safe in the knowledge that there’s still a few bucks in the pot for the next rainy day.

Seems that when the word defraud is used here, it magically turns into the word disagree.

The alchemists would love it.

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April 15, 2008 at 5:30 pm

Good week in Hollywood

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It’s not often the Auld Git goes to sleep with a smile on his face from news about Hollywood, but the news was a little better than usual this week.

First off the presses was a note about a spat between the Odeon cinema chain and Sony had screwed up Stallone’s pocket money collection, to the effect that the chain wasn’t showing the latest repeat, sorry remake, sorry New Film: Rambo (where have I heard that before?), and that the opening take was miraculously halved as a result of this little tiff, so that it only collected something like £1.27 million in its opening weekend, instead of an expected (yeh, right, like it would’ve) £2.5 to £3 million if it had screened as widely as it ‘should’.

You can just imagine Stallone and his other over-paid cronies crying into their gold breakfast dishes over the loss.

Then there was more good new, with the announcement that the annual “Let’s all pat ourselves on the back and give ourselves nice awards to let the world know how great we think we are” awards flopped and this year’s Oscars ceremony returned the ceremony’s lowest TV ratings in the US, according to initial figures.

Why anyone would even bother to look at this mindless rubbish is beyond the Auld Git, as the pre-rehearsed awards hysterics are enacted, and ACTORS ACT SURPRISED, while the collect the badges that they have paid for to ensure their place in the pecking order to decide just where in the money laden trough their snouts will land next year.

Maybe it’s worth watching this stuff just to see how far they’re prepared to go to make it look as if any of the awards and winners are surprised.

Maybe one day they’ll make in interesting, and put one of Saddam’s followers in charge, and as selected ‘Lucky Winners’ are led outside, there will be a BANG, and an announcement of another retiral, to make way for next year’s Next Big Thing.

Hey, maybe the writers will go on strike, AND never come back.

(No, never happen, who’d give up a multi-million dinner ticket after all – still, they should be taught some sort of lesson, taking home more that most folks lifetime earnings in a week, they deserve to be thrown out without a cent for having the gall to go on strike.)

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February 26, 2008 at 1:56 pm